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Friday, May 2, 2008

Sweet Dreams

I just tucked both of my angels in for the night. This week was another crazy one. We're having a Quatro de Mayo party on Sunday for church and a personal bbq at our house tomorrow. I volunteered (yeah, you heard me right--volunteered) to get all the food at Sam's. I love Sam's. I was going to do a click n pull order for the church stuff and just swing in for a leisurely stroll for a few personal things. Well, I realized that my week had quickly filled up with things to do so I had to go on Wednesday and couldn't do the click n pull, you have to give them 12 hours notice or something. So, I am pushing the kids and about a jillion pounds of Quatro de Mayo supplies around Sams along with a HUGE bag of dog food and the massive package of paper towels for us. It was crazy. I need to learn that about myself, I think I can do more than I can and then I get mad about it. Not mad at anybody just myself. I feel myself feeling overwhelmed and then I feel like my kids suffer because I take that out on them. I hate that. Today, I had to get some of the non Sam's items and I just realized I still haven't gotten the pinata...I guess that's tomorrow. UGH!! Anyway, today I had Maddie, my friend's daughter and she plays so good with Addy so it's fun. We just did a lot of running. As the evening progressed and I drug Addy and Keegan to one last grocery store, I felt myself just expecting more of Addy than she could give. As I laid in bed with her praying tonight, I asked her to forgive me for being "mean" as she calls it. Most of the time, "mean" means telling her to quit screaming or taking something from Keegan or asking her to put her toys up but tonight mean was appropriate for Mommy being impatient and short tempered. Usually, I leave her in bed awake after our routine of reading a story, then a Bible story, then praying, and then singing. If Daddy puts her to bed, he adds an original "Once Upon a Time" story in there, usually involving a princess with red hair and blue eyes. Tonight, I stayed until she was asleep. I fought back tears as I thanked God for these precious gifts He's blessed us with. I don't ever want to take them for granted or rush through phases of their lives because I'm busy or "volunteer" for more than I can "sanely" handle. I love them more than life itself and I would do anything for them. I am so grateful that I get to be Mommy to two of the most precious beings on this planet.

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