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Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Fighting the urge

Sometimes on my blog I want to blog about pretty specific stuff but I don't feel like I can.  I realize this is my blog and I can write about whatever I want. However, at the same time, I want to remember it's not so much a public forum for me to vent when something irritates me or when things aren't "fair" (you know I'm a just kind of girl).  Sometimes I have to fight that.  I'll read stuff that annoys me on twitter or facebook or have a situation and want to march into my computer and BLOG my little heart out. I have a friend, Wonder Woman, who works with social media stuff. A few months ago we were talking and conflict came up...not a specific conflict, literally the issue of conflict and how now, younger people (and maybe some older too) don't know how to deal with confrontation or conflict.  They blog about it or tweet about it or send a scathing email and that is how they deal with conflict and confrontation.  Um, that is SUPER unhealthy.  It reminds me of a story from a basketball coach in college (I didn't play-as if you wondered but I was friends with her).  She told about she was in a game and this girl fouled her hard from behind and she wanted to think of something mean and ugly to say but all that came out was, "TRIP ME TO MY FACE!"  That's kind of what I think about online conflict resolution.  Don't hide behind a computer, trip me to my face!  Say it to my face so that I can hear your tone and see your emotion and then I can respond and you can see my reaction.  Why hide behind nasty words or ugly digs?  When you do that, you are trying to control and you say things stronger and meaner than you most likely would if you were having a conversation.  And, really, when you confront someone, it should be out of love and trying to make a relationship better, not trying to beat someone down.  I kind of got off topic...I didn't receive an email or a nasty tweet or anything like that. I honestly read some face book updates from people that I haven't seen in forever and I get irritated. I don't even know why.  It doesn't affect me, it doesn't change me, it doesn't have one thing to do with me. I compare to myself and I get frustrated that I don't have the opportunity or the means or the situation that they have and I surely would not handle myself the way they did, yada yada yada.  It's easy to sit in a place of judgement, easy but wrong.  So, I guess I'm slapping myself on the hand through this blog.  I want to fight the urge to blog out of selfish, jealousy.  I don't have to fix others or make them feel stupid or make myself look better through some blog that they will not ever read.  I will say to you, my readers:)  When it comes to sending a nasty email or tweeting an ugly dig at someone, DON'T...trip them to their face and deal with it in a way that might actually strengthen the relationship not abolish it.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Good preaching girl. Needed to be said. Hope you, Levy and your entire family have the most wonderful Christmas ever.