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Sunday, June 22, 2008

Sunday

We had a great Sunday today. We were down a little at church which is kind of a bummer. I can't wait till we're in our own building, that will be great. We are doing a "One Prayer" series and today we heard from Perry Noble and his prayer is that the church would be dangerous. Aside from him just being HILARIOUS, he was really good. He talked about Christ followers being in two lines, those that are frustrated because they can't see God working and then those that are anticpating Him doing something awesome because they've seen Him work before. I find myself flip flopping from those two sides. I have no reason not to believe that God will do awesome things because we have seen Him work in our lives especially over this last year in miraculous ways. However, I tend to be in the frustrated line because it's not in my time. I know that's a control issue. I want things a certain way and it's hard for me if things don't always go according to plan. I want to work on that. I want to live life anticipating what God is going to do next. Another thing Perry spoke on today was thinking that God isn't big enough to handle my problems. What I realized today was that my problems are piddly....they're not problems, they're more like inconveniences. Again, I want to be okay with that. I don't want to complain or feel sorry for myself. I can definitely see that I cycle through some of those things...some of that is being a woman and sometimes I think I struggle with some mild depression/moodiness. Yeah, I know some of you are saying, "Finally, she admits it." :) I'm okay with that too...I can admit it, no denial here (at least about that). Sometimes I catch myself trying to control situations and think that people should act one way (and most of the time it's the way that I would act) and when they don't, it irritates the fire out of me. I realize that is controlling, again no denial. I'm going to try to work on that. People can do, act, and treat others the way they do and it's okay. It's not a reflection on me, it's not an attack of me. I can only control myself and how I choose to act. I went through the Celebrate Recovery 12 Step Program when we lived in Burlington. One of my greatest friends in the world, led a group for the pastors/staff wives at our church. It was one of the most helpful things I've done. I saw that you don't have to be addicted or abused to have issues in your life. We all have issues because we all live life. It was so good to just look at myself honestly and try to work through and see how the experiences in my life shaped who I was. It was good to be able to look at who God made me to be and be that. I really need to go back over that material monthly to be refreshed and to see how I've changed (for the good and bad) over the last year. I want to be reflective.

Again a random blog....it was a good day. Our neighbors came over and played the Wii today. It was fun, they're so silly. They love our kids and our kids love them. We ate at Double Daves with some friends....one of Levi's favorites.

By the way, the challenge that I talked about yesterday with the James Bond theme song playing in your head....MISSION ACCOMPLISHED...at least part 1 of the mission is accomplished.

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