Chill

This morning has been very chill for me.  I wrote myself a cleaning schedule for the week, loaded & unloaded the dishwasher, started a load of laundry, cleaned the kitchen, took A to school, read my Bible, cleaned & started the roomba, fixed breakfast & two snacks so for for K, took pics of our fridge to post to craiglist, and fixed myself a cup of hot cocoa.  Now, I'm sitting and I'm reflecting.  As I type all of that, it doesn't sound very chill but one thing that has consistently been missing for me is my Bible time in the morning.  I'm hit or miss.  I'm really going to try this year to be HIT.  It makes such a difference in my outlook and my attitude.  Lots of days, I go go go.  And most of the time it is necessary going, errands, grocery shopping, meeting people to eat lunch or play with K (maybe those last 2 aren't TOTALLY necessary but they are important).  Some days, I'm reminded that I just need to chill. I need to take time to take care of me and my house and not feel so rushed.  When I do, I find myself reflecting more...I'm not so good at that these days.  I'm sitting here reflecting on my time with family over the holidays and how lucky I am to be the wife of Levi and the mother of A & K.  I'm lucky to have the friends that I have.  I am truly blessed, not with things but with people and with love.  I'm also thankful for forgiveness and mercy and grace.  Ashamedly, I admit that I want to harbor and not give mercy and compassion freely to all and that's wrong.  I was reminded during my Bible reading this morning that when I am weak, HE is strong and I can rely on His strength not my own.  That was  good way to start my morning.  As moms, I think we put ourselves last and take care of everybody else and do all the running and fixing and taking care of  and we go on empty so much of the time...let me say I do at least.  I'm trying to reprioritize myself, not to take care of me in a selfish way but to take care of my spirit and soul so my outlook and attitude is more reflective of Christ.  That's my prayer today!!